Dear Hipsters, sometimes you get it so very wrong it hurts and ...

[Too Tall]

I'd like to put my arm around you, go for a walk and let's have a talk about how "light roasts" are not the last word in coffee beans.

Holy he!! out of desperation I've fell for it. As it says on my domain www.tootalls-coffeeroaster-is-dead.com blog, I am now with you commonfolk relying on the kindness of strangers for my roasted beans. Being that my true nature is a trusting soul who believes that any human being that roasts a bean is superior, honest in possession of virtue no less than Mother Teresa herself. Yeah? With me so far?

Last week I was out and about doing NFS deliveries on the Moto and spied a storied roaster near Logan Circle. I won't tell you the name of the shop because those sweet deluded hipsters in their tight jeans are already struggling enough as is to maintain the persona. They do not need an angry hoard of VS true believers rushing the joint with pitchforks...ok ok I'm taking this too far whatever.

The point of all this is that in my limited view of the roasted bean world there is almost never a reason to tout "light" roasted beans as the cats meow. They can be interesting but almost never a daily fair...YET the sweet faced hipster sales persons reaction when I asked for a couple pounds of City+ Ethiopian if they had it was (an this is a near exact quote) "we do not sell any dark roasts, all of our beans are light to medium light roasts which preserve the flavor nuances". I blinked "yah gotta be sh!ttn' me parder".

Dewds, I was down to stems and seeds I needed a bag of beans and foolishly bought two.

As I sit in the Airstream GRINDING away at these rocks, seriously the fekin' beans are so under-roasted they are almost too hard for my grinder, I'm laughing at this. What have we become to allow the sweet hipsters go unchecked.

It's time to hug your hipster and tell them the truth.

XXOO bitches.

[NYCfixie]

I'd like to put my arm around you, go for a walk, and let's have a talk about how [insert topic here] is/are not the last word in [insert topic here].

It's time to hug your hipster and tell them the truth.

I believe this framework can be used for anything related to hipsters (i.e. ironic facial hair, man buns, brewing beer, personal space, uptalking).

[Gattonero]

I believe this framework can be used for anything related to hipsters (i.e. ironic facial hair, man buns, brewing beer, personal space, uptalking).

and talking to their mobile phone while keeping it horizontal flat in front of the face?

[deano]

That's the province of suburban moms driving Chevy suburbans in the states.

[Too Tall]

That's the province of suburban moms driving Chevy suburbans in the states.

With Katy Perry blaring at level 11

[SlowPokePete]

I blinked "yah gotta be sh!ttn' me parder".

Dark roast or DEATH...

SPP

[Too Tall]

Dark roast or DEATH...

SPP

Good tee shirt.

[mzilliox]

while i agree there is a point of too light, the point of too dark comes much faster and is much worse. Lots of people seem to love the taste of burn, not coffee. thats weird.

Dark roasts are a waste of coffee, or a solution for bad coffee

[bigbill]

First off, I'm a coffee achiever. I spent 27 years doing deployments in the Navy and have run the gamut of coffee. In the work and home environment, I equate a good cup of coffee to an ice cold Coca-Cola you have on a long summer ride. It fixes everything. I could have the worst day ever on deployment but a good cup would make it all ok, even that one time when I had a bone sticking out. Coffee should be rich, something to savor, and not try to do too much. A good coffee stands alone, it doesn't need anything, coffee flavored coffee.

When I was stationed in Sardinia, I went to the local grocery to buy coffee for my French press. They didn't sell coffee, the manager directed me to a café that sold coffee. I wasn't to make my own, I was to plop down a euro at Guido's for a cup. I got it. But it was still really inconvenient. A friend in Tacoma roasted his own and sent me several vacuum bags of his own dark roast. It was wonderful coffee, rich and smooth.

I think all the hipsters who want to change our coffee habits should be rounded up and sent to Italy where they'll be forced to order a decaf at the end of a dinner. They can face the shame when the waiter arrives with a cup of hot water and tosses a packet of Sanka on the table in disgust.

[colker]

First off, I'm a coffee achiever. I spent 27 years doing deployments in the Navy and have run the gamut of coffee. In the work and home environment, I equate a good cup of coffee to an ice cold Coca-Cola you have on a long summer ride. It fixes everything. I could have the worst day ever on deployment but a good cup would make it all ok, even that one time when I had a bone sticking out. Coffee should be rich, something to savor, and not try to do too much. A good coffee stands alone, it doesn't need anything, coffee flavored coffee.

When I was stationed in Sardinia, I went to the local grocery to buy coffee for my French press. They didn't sell coffee, the manager directed me to a café that sold coffee. I wasn't to make my own, I was to plop down a euro at Guido's for a cup. I got it. But it was still really inconvenient. A friend in Tacoma roasted his own and sent me several vacuum bags of his own dark roast. It was wonderful coffee, rich and smooth.

I think all the hipsters who want to change our coffee habits should be rounded up and sent to Italy where they'll be forced to order a decaf at the end of a dinner. They can face the shame when the waiter arrives with a cup of hot water and tosses a packet of Sanka on the table in disgust.

My 84 yr old mother agrees w/ you. She is been having a tough time health wise but lightens up when it´s tme for her coffee cup. You guys are right; as long as we can have a nice cup of coffee there is hope.

[Gattonero]

...
When I was stationed in Sardinia, I went to the local grocery to buy coffee for my French press. They didn't sell coffee, the manager directed me to a café that sold coffee. ...

Were you at Decimomannu? Most of the NATO training places in Sardinia are -obviously- located in areas where nothing much is going on. Even though, I'm surprised you couldn't get some Lavazza at the local store? Old-school bars, especially in small towns, would sell you ground coffee if you're in real need, when I was a kid had happened a few times to be sent on a sunday afternoon and coming back with a paper roll and an ice-lolly. The latter used to have a great taste, perhaps due to the intense smell of coffee packed inside the brown paper.

[Scott G.]

while i agree there is a point of too light, the point of too dark comes much faster and is much worse. Lots of people seem to love the taste of burn, not coffee. thats weird.
[snip]

If it didn't taste burnt, it wouldn't be Starbucks.

[jmgorman]

Toots - come on down to Alexandria. Swings has been in business long enough to know how to light roast and have the experience not to burn the (still available in some great variety) dark roasts.

They'll even let you play around in the lab if you ask real nice.

[PaMtbRider]

while i agree there is a point of too light, the point of too dark comes much faster and is much worse. Lots of people seem to love the taste of burn, not coffee. thats weird.

Dark roasts are a waste of coffee, or a solution for bad coffee

Beer is the same way. I'm not going to drink a Coors light, but I also don't want my beer so bitter that it isn't drinkable.

[mmoore]

^agreed. recently had a "bitter" beer
was like drinking a warheads candy.

couldn't finish it.

[Wisco]

while i agree there is a point of too light, the point of too dark comes much faster and is much worse. Lots of people seem to love the taste of burn, not coffee. thats weird.

Dark roasts are a waste of coffee, or a solution for bad coffee

What I don't get about the "dark roast crowd" is how they like coffee where you taste only the roast not the inherent flavor profile of the bean and the cherry. The good lighter roasts leave the fruit and flower flavors/smells and when brewed correctly are really clean at the finish assuming Chemex, V60 or Hario pour over brew. With light roasts, you also can taste the differences between different single origin beans while dark all taste the same to me... and burnt. In the end, roast is one of the many factors in a cup of coffee but roast can overshadow everything. YMMV.

[sk_tle]

Do hipsters still exist ?

That said, give me a Gyokuro any day.

[CXinNH]

while i agree there is a point of too light, the point of too dark comes much faster and is much worse. Lots of people seem to love the taste of burn, not coffee. thats weird.

Dark roasts are a waste of coffee, or a solution for bad coffee

So true.
If you don't like coffee - go dark. At least you will make sure to get rid of all the nuances. Wasted beans. Go starnucks.

[vertical_doug]

So true.
If you don't like coffee - go dark. At least you will make sure to get rid of all the nuances. Wasted beans. Go starnucks.

Sounds like a man who enjoys his Kopi Luwak with just a hint of civet poop and nuance of wild cherries but bold snark.

[Gradient]

Dark roast or DEATH...

SPP

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