The Joke Thread

[osbk67]

What did the Buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor?

Make me one with everything.

[j44ke]

What did the Buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor?

Make me one with everything.

What did the hotdog vendor say to the Buddhist monk when he asked for his change?

Change must come from within.

[ides1056]

I am waiting for Mark Nobilette to build a frame for me. His blog is written in Latin. So I tried two different online Latin 2 English translators. The first sentence translates: " Fresh Japanese Moms" on one site, and " each arrow is an easy skirt" on the other.

Made me laugh.

[beeatnik]

What’s black and white and read all over? The Vaccine Thread. Wocka, wocka.

[echappist]

Okay, I'm a bit slow and would like to have this joke explained. What am I missing?

[SlowPokePete]

The pharmacy guy is misunderstood by the customer, who thinks he is asking if he needs to deodorize his balls or his ass.

It looks like he does.

SPP

[robin3mj]

What do you call the greatest hockey player who never played?



Wayne Regretzky.

[echappist]

The pharmacy guy is misunderstood by the customer, who thinks he is asking if he needs to deodorize his balls or his ass.

It looks like he does.

SPP

Thanks. I didnt make a connection that aerosol could be misheard as ass.

[j44ke]

Thanks. I didnt make a connection that aerosol could be misheard as ass.

Only in England and only with a Swedish speaker.

American reporter friend worked in Austria for years. Speaks fluent (Austrian) German. His wife is Austrian. His kids are Austrian. Went to a press dinner for Austrian politicians and press - sort of like the National Press Club dinner here - and listened to an Austrian comedian who got the audience roaring with laughter. He couldn't figure out what was going on. The comedian was just reciting a series of government announcements. He asked a colleague who was laughing what was so funny - this seemed like very plain boring language. Yes, his colleague said, but he's doing it with a Silesian accent.

[Paul Jacobs]

Only in England and only with a Swedish speaker.

In England we defecate through the arsehole and also pronounce the word arse differently from ass, as Jorn appreciates.

This reminds me of the parent who received a bill for school fees of £X,000 per anum (sic). The reply was that the family would like to continue paying as before, that is through the nose.

[Paul Jacobs]

From a Christmas Cracker.

Why do bicycles fall over?

Because they are two tired.

[echappist]

From a Christmas Cracker.

Why do bicycles fall over?

Because they are two tired.

Although I know what they are (from watching Dr. Who), you probably need to explain what a Christmas Cracker is

[Paul Jacobs]

Although I know what they are (from watching Dr. Who), you probably need to explain what a Christmas Cracker is

Sorry, and thank you for pointing this out.

It is a paper cylinder containing jokes and gifts with a central paper strip which gives a minor explosion (crack) when pulled apart, usually by two people each holding one end.

This gives some idea

https://preview.telegraph.co.uk/chri...kes-ever-2021/

[progetto]

I found an interesting fact today, apparently on the Canary Islands there are no canaries, and on the Virgin Islands, you guessed it, no canaries there either.

[rwsaunders]